I have a hard time finishing projects – my chaotic mark can be witnessed in all sorts of places in my life – the unfinished novel (not to mention a bunch of stories that I’ve started, discarded, etc.), the recipe project I’ve been working on for about a zillion years where I’ve saved recipes from about five years worth of cooking magazines with the intent of organizing them and creating a binder of awesomeness, the quilt I started a few years back from old blue jeans, the scarf I started crocheting over 10 years ago (that actually looks quite terrible – I don’t think I’ll ever finish that) … I think you get the drift. I get very excited in March and April to start the seedlings for my garden, but by mid-August I am impatient and sick and tired of watering my tomato plants.
So … today I am $488.71 closer to being credit card debt free. With my car paid off, I no longer have that obligation and my student loan payment isn’t due until the end of the month, so I made a $550 payment this morning – hence the remaining $488.71 owed. If I pay $200 next week, I will be able to finish paying off my credit card entirely on October 29, 2009. (Writing the date out in full adds to the importance of the situation, you know …).
As soon as I hit the “Submit” button from my checking account, I sent an email to my husband to tell him that we were almost done. Here’s the exchange:
Hubby: hugs. i’m proud of you.
Me: I just want to be done! :-/ And i will be. I just wish I could pay the money now.
Hubby: i know. if you want, i can write you a check. then it’s done and you can work on building some savings and contributing to the mortgage. we’ll have to sit down and figure out what our expenses are.
Ever since my husband’s email was sent to me at 8:50 a.m. this morning I have been struggling with temptation. Hubby has the money in his checking account – it would not put us in financial jeopardy if I took this money and paid it towards my final credit card. And although we have separate checking accounts, we are married – what’s his is mine, what’s mine is his, etc.
Hubby: it’s not like you’re going to stop working at the cab company right away. you’ll still be working to put money back in your savings and to put money toward the house. you’d pay me $488 in two weeks instead of the credit card.
ARGH! I want to just be DONE with the credit cards but darn it … there’s a part of me – that part that has the unfinished novel, that got rid of her sewing machine – that wants to finish this on my own. (Never mind that I’ve been building up this INSANE amount of fanfare in my own head over this whole payoff thing.)
Is my pride and ego getting in the way of financial security or should I stick to my guns and make my own way across this finish line? I couldn’t have gotten this far so quickly without the support of my husband and he’s right – my life isn’t going to change tomorrow if I take this money from him – I’m still at the cab company for the foreseeable future, I still have a journey ahead of me to stay out of debt.
What would you do?
Working on Your Debt?
Join our FREE newsletter to get even more helpful tips straight to your inbox.