Before you automatically close this post and think “oh, I’ve read her whining before,” I need to amend what I’m going to say with this: All of my angst is better this time around. Or at least, the problems that I find myself in this time are manageable. And – dare I say? – able to be fixed.
Work has been rough lately. The kind of rough that seems to settle right into my face and makes me feel like I’m suffering from a sinus infection. The kind of rough that starts about 9 a.m. (mercifully after my coffee has kicked in) and lets up right around 4:30 p.m., when I just kind of sit there at my desk with this pressure building up in my face and wonder what the hell happened to my day.
So here’s my philosophy and here’s why I write about these things in a debt reduction blog. The average American spends 80 percent of their day working outside of their home or on projects that are not home-related (I’m throwing in that caveat for those folks who work from home). If you are happy at your job, chances are good that your life is generally happy. And if you’re like me – a Happy Michelle is less apt to do such destructive things like overeat or mindlessly spend money. Since overspending got me into debt in the first place, I am the first person to try to cultivate a happy work environment. Life will never be perfect and work is work, but when I end my work days feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck, I recognize that it’s time to reassess what actions got me here in the first place.
So after coming home late and bitching at my husband for about a half hour (not making supper or doing anything productive in my house at this point, I might add), I took a leap of faith and emailed my boss to see if we can get time on the calendar in the near future to discuss how I can carve out some goals to make me feel more effective and what I can be doing to maximize my time at work.
In the grand scheme of everything that I’ve done in my work career, this isn’t a huge leap of faith for me (that would be 2006 when I decided to leave journalism). I have been in jobs where I would have rather shoved letter openers under my fingernails before I would admit weakness to my superiors. I’m in a good spot now where I do have a lot of trust in the people that I work with. Should I have slept on an action plan before emailing my boss to set up a meeting? Maybe, but I’ll be blunt – I’ve had a few sleepless nights over the past week or so where I’ve gone back and forth in my head over how I should deal with this situation. I have action plans that I want to propose to my boss. I know the places where I’ve been deficient and I think I know what I need to do to remedy the situation. Work is just complicated right now and this is one of those times that I’d rather be proactive and seek the help that I need now to be a better employee, rather than kick myself six months down the road when I am completely burnt out and at the end of my rope.
Leaps of faith aren’t for everyone. But in this case, I feel confident in my decision and I’m really looking forward to getting some guidance. And if I’m wrong? Well, that’s another blog post for another time.
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